Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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