A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize