Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
