maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize