doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
