she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Your penis caused this!
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize