already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
is it fun? or sober?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
