Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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