Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
