is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
