using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
