i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
last night I used snow as a chaser
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize