I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
