Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
