I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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