hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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