She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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