So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
