Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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