um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
