Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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