I smell stomach acid.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
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