yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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