when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
