Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
