Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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