ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
this just has baby written all over it
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
