so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
