i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Little spoons don't ask big questions
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
