I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
