The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
