Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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