Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
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