the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
