She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Randomize
