All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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