he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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