The maid of honor just puked.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
