I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
tell me about the eggs
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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