you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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