Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
