The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
