But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
