She said her name was "party"
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
