The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
