i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
