winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize