Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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