I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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