The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
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