At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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